So yeah... rankings.


96th - Mike - 2nd Place

Mike sucks

This should be no surprise to anyone. I hate Mike, I hate everything he represents. He is just such an overused, annoying, gimmicky, and perhaps even offensive character that I can’t not have him in last place, his ROTI version was pretty bad, but this version was somehow worse.

He started out the season okay, I guess, his gimmick was still there even though it had been resolved (in a much, much better way) last season, but it wasn’t quite at the level of overuse yet, other plots were being set up, everything was fine and good. But then Mal happened.

Mal is the main reason I despise TDAS Mike, and the main reason he is the worst character in TD history (in my opinion, of course). First off, Mal was a terrible antagonist. All he did for about 2/3 of the season was break stuff like Sam’s Gameboy, Sierra’s phone, and Duncan’s knife. Quality antagonist, everyone. I actually do like the idea of someone just doing things for laughs but Mal was just extremely lame.

Then around episode eight he began sabotaging stuff, leading to a string of very unimpressive Zoey immunity wins, which again was pretty lame. Only surfacing to give confessional after confessional of how he was going to play these fools or whatever. In episodes nine and ten he killed Cameron and Alejandro essentially, and he tried to kill Gwen in the penultimate episode, which was just kind of hard to watch, and anyone who makes me feel bad for Cameron really sucks.

But really, it was the finale that made this guy my least favorite character. Mal in the finale started out just being the kind of generic douche he was, mocking Zoey a bunch and stuff because she figured out too late and stuff. But as the episode went on, not only did we get one of the most anti-climactic endings ever, we got quite possibly the worst ending in TD history. Mike and his other personalities stormed this tower in his mind, and then climbed a bunch of stairs (off-screen, no less) without much of a challenge, and as Mal was about to kill Zoey or something, they reach the top… where there is a button to reset his mind and get rid of his personalities.


This was awful, it was completely inaccurate, and just plain wrong to me. I wasn’t offended personally, but I can see why people would be offended by this. Because out of anything in TD to be offended about, this is the worst thing they’ve done. Only really rivaled by Scott’s “karma”.

But unfortunately it doesn’t even stop there, not only is his mind reset and he got rid of his personalities, he gains super-powers that the personalities offer (aka Svetlana’s gymnastic skills, Vito’s strength or whatever, etc) and he gets the girl, and in one ending, he gets the money. This is a terrible, terrible thing. Overall I just can’t support anything Mike/Mal stands for in the series, and his existence really marks what I would consider a low point in the series, and thankfully Pahkitew Island was so good to give me hope for the series after the shitfest that was Total Drama Mike.

Clue for #95: Made the F4.

95th - Zoey - All-Stars - 1st Place

Zoey finds out

Zoey in All-Stars was just… frustrating. More than anything else, that’d be the word I’d use to describe her. I will always hold the opinion ROTI Zoey was alright, but here she was just dumbed down and turned into a complete idiot for almost the entire season.

When the season started, like Mike, she was pretty low key but she had a slower start than Mike, and never really got quite as big. In the season itself, she did very little, except for win challenges for her team (clearly the inferior team btw) and have “cute” scenes with Mike… but PLOT TWIST Mike isn’t who he seems!

Of course, Zoey doesn’t know this, she doesn’t seem to know much of anything at all in this season, but everyone loves her. She was loved by everyone but was completely and utterly oblivious to anything anyone had to say about Mal, and even took him to the F2. He basically kills Cameron and Alejandro and she is completely unaware because she thinks he’d never do that. Lovely.

I think the main problem I had with Zoey in this season is that in ROTI she actually had some development, and here they just kinda devolved her into the stereotypical nice girl role even more than they pushed that role for her in ROTI.

I dunno, her win is just so hollow to me. Like, she won almost every single challenge she was in (I think she only lost like three or four of fourteen challenges?), everyone praised and loved her, even Courtney. Courtney compliments nobody ever, so why is she complimenting Zoey? And to top it all off, she wins the game loved and adored by everyone with zero flaws and a “Fixed” boyfriend.

Honestly they just could’ve done so much more with Zoey but they shifted her into an extremely stereotypical and boring role again, but left out any kind of development and I don’t even like considering her the winner, but she’s better than Mike.

Clue For #94: Made Merge


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